Love Jones

As I sit and enjoy my summer or lack thereof, I began to realize that many of the people I’ve grown up with or knew from school are either married, getting married, or recently engaged. Now this is all fine and dandy being that we are all 25+, but now I’m constantly getting asked the question (mainly by my mother) when I’m going to join the club. At first I had a slight mid- life crisis before the mid-life, but then I realized it’s all about timing. And right now it’s obviously not my time to be in a relationship (or married). Right now I have tunnel vision, well really I just want finish Graduate school, every time Sallie emails me I get depressed all over again. *sigh* (college students feel me). I’ve come to realize the value that higher education has on a young African-American woman like myself. I figure at the right time everything relationship wise will fall into place. Don’t get me wrong, there is someone I'm interested in, but once again timing is everything. We are both focused on being successful in our own right, can’t argue with that, right? Who wants to be with someone that hasn’t accomplished anything, dreams are great, but at some point you need to show some results.

Marriage is something that I only want to go through once. So many couples rush to jump the broom, but never take the time to truly get to know the person they are marrying. With an extremely high divorce rate, I feel it’s only right to have a marriage that is a success story versus just another statistic. Many studies have suggested that not only are less African-American couples getting married, but more are also getting divorced. The reason behind the high divorce rate is the lack of education amongst married African-American couples. The lack of education leads to money issues, which is a very prominent reason for couples getting divorced. Although I think the logic behind African-American couples divorcing is very true, more African-American couples are being educated now than ever before. So will this hopefully change the divorce rates among African-American couples, since many studies show that the lack of education plays a large role, let’s hope so! So maybe when the time is right I'll be in a relationship of my own. Who knows, one day I too will join the club. At least now I understand that it’s okay to have tunnel vision and focus on accomplishing goals, as long as time doesn’t slip away.

So ladies (and gentlemen), I have to ask, what are your thoughts on marriage within the African-American community? Do you feel that more or less marriages are succeeding?

Congratulations to all those mature enough to take the next step!

Britt Daise
Urban Echelon Magazine & BlogSpot

Twitter: thisisbee